It has always been said that women do not know what they want. As much as I would like to fall into the category of women who can denounce that fact by going after exactly what they want, I cannot. Looking back on last year, I realize that most of my frustration was brought on by confusion.
I had trouble deciphering the needs from the wants. I wanted to be [insert type of person here]. I wanted to do [insert activity here]. I felt that if I could just accomplish this want, then I would be happy or more satisfied or fixed, BUT I learned that it does not work like that.
One of the problems was that I was basing these wants and needs off of everyone and everything else. What they needed and wanted or what they thought I needed and wanted. I never really dug deep inside myself to figure out what the root of my feelings really were.
I really struggled with feeling alone. Of course I had friends and people around, but I wanted more… I wanted to be chosen and I wanted to be invited (and given the opportunity to decline). That was always such a big deal to me and I could never really figure out why I cared so much. I am an introvert, so spending time with people should be the least of my wants, but it never was.
I need to analyze myself and really learn about who I am inside and what makes me tick. There are reasons I feel certain ways and I just have to pinpoint what they are. So I set out to figure out why I seemed to crave just an hour out of my friend’s day or a conversation here and there and what I found out is that I cherish quality time.
I took this quiz and my results were so accurate it was scary! As I read more information on being a ‘quality time’ person, it all made sense. Having this kind of insight into my own personality made me view my feelings and actions in such a different light.
This past semester was especially difficult, because friends who I was accustomed to talking to and spending time with had graduated and I was feeling quite neglected from the few friends I still had around. Instead of changing my mindset, I just holed up and isolated myself which only made matters worse.
It feels so good to have some clarity on why I was feeling the way I was and I am hoping to start learning more about myself and the people I care about, so I can be the friend that they need!!